23.
I think its human to be a little ungrateful.
I am most of the times.
I whine.
And complain.
And sulk.
And compare.
This year, however, I decided to do this thing called gratitude.
So far, it feels pretty fucking amazing.
I turned 23 today and I am the lightest I have ever been.
I woke up with an overwhelming feeling of happiness and gratitude.
I’m grateful for a lot of things in my life and I have this long unending list I have written down but because it is my birthday it is only right I give this list a number.
In no particular order, these are 23 things I am grateful for today.
1) Family.
It is the only thing that makes perfect sense to me in the chaos of this world. I’m incredibly lucky and blessed to have the close knit relationship I have with them. I do not take it for granted.
2) Chocolate Cake.
Because. It. Is Chocolate. Cake. I mean…come on. It is warm, gooey and absolutely decadent. Chocolate cake is a clear testament that God exists. What other testimony do you need?
3) Yam.
I could cry. I genuinely believe yam was made for me. And I was made for yam. There is no food on this earth that could ever bring be as much bliss as yam.
Chocolate cake is a close second.
A world where yam does not exist is a world I do not want to exist in.
4) Love
I googled hopeless romantic and my name came up. I am in every sense of the word, in love with love. I have tried and failed miserably to act like my life does not revolve around love…it does. I’m tired of pretending. I love love. Every single facet of it.
5) Books.
because they smell like magic.
I love how the feel on my palms, how the crook of my fingers try to fit into them. I love when they land on my face in between reads, my nose getting lost in the scent of them.
My favorite part; I love the words. How each word takes me farther and farther from reality. Like hard drugs; An escapism from reality. I want to live in a book. Take pieces of me, condense them into words until I join all their narratives.
6) Crime documentaries
Because they remind me of my father. And being 7. And tattered James Hadley chase novels.
I love the adrenaline it gives me. An adrenaline I rarely get from living
7) Selena Gomez.
Because.
8) My heart
I am grateful that I have a big beautiful heart that beats loudly. And yes, my heart does beat loudly.
A heart that is deeper than the oceans. A heart that feels anything and everything. I’m grateful for the vulnerability trapped inside it.
9) Love.
Again? Again.
10) My Butt.
Because it is a fucking masterpiece.
Because it looks good in jeans. And tight gowns. And shorts. And everything in between.
And because it was artfully handcrafted by God.
11) My mind.
Because it is my favorite place to be. It is creative and scary and quirky and a little messy and sometimes I get a little lost in it but living inside it is an adventure I’m glad I get to ride for life.
12) Writing.
I’m glad that I can tell stories through my writing. I’m glad that it is something that comes effortlessly to me. I’m glad that people can resonate and connect with my words.
I’m glad that I can unburden bits and pieces of me in words.
I’m grateful that I get to do this for life.
13) My name.
Because It is a completely beautiful name that captures my entire being.
14) My little cousin
Because he is the most adorable unreal human in the entire world. I’m grateful that I get to watch him grow a little taller, a little smarter and just grow a little more every day.
15) Work.
I’m grateful that I get to do what I love and still get paid for it. Absolutely absolutely amazing.
16) Dancing.
I love to dance. It’s one of the most artistic expressions of emotions for me. I’m grateful that I can sway my hips to songs, get naked in the comfort of my room and trap those lyrics in each fluid body movement.
17) Music.
Because what is life without good music?
For a wildly imaginative mind, music is my fuel.
I love how I get to tap into different emotions.
I love how temporary I make each emotions mine.
I love that different sounds and lyrics work to create pieces that feel like heaven.
18) Love.
This is the last time I will mention it, I promise. I’m so in love with love. Sometimes I think I’m more in love with the concept than the actual humans I have to live this love with.
It’s like in my brain.
My blood.
I can’t get it off.
I love that love is something so simple and achingly beautiful. I love that it is not linear or straightforward most times. I love all the wildly complicated parts of it. I like running through each part, gasping for breath from all the exertions. I am grateful that I get to live and experience a life full of so much love.
19) Epidurals
Because I want to have a baby/babies one day and I do not fancy writhing and gritting in pain or sheer agony.
20) Ibuprofen.
Because it fights for me. On days when my period is hell bent on ruining me, it shows up and fight. And it always wins.
21) Noodles.
Because I get to eat something close to real food in minutes? Come on!
It’s the thoughtfulness for me.
It’s the Inclusivity for me.
The fact that people came together and decided to make something for the lazy peeps too.
22) Rain.
My favorite time to do anything is when it’s raining. I get so giddy when the rain starts. It’s one the best representation of nature.
I love the pitter patter sounds they make when the fall, absolute music to my ears.
I love how it suspends activities, how streets suddenly look deserted and how people cancel plans and stay cooped up in their beds.
23) Friends.
I have won with my friends. That’s it. This one is pretty short but I mean this. I mean this with every fiber of my being.
God.
This is not on the list because it’s a constant.
He loves me. He really does. God loves me.
It’s all encompassing.
It is peace and warmth and light and everything good.
I am genuinely entirely grateful to God for everything.
I am glad to be doing 23 years on this earth. It feels pretty amazing.
I have never felt this much love, peace, and joy in all my years on earth.
I want to memorialize this feeling here.
Today. Tomorrow and forever.
Happy birthday to Me!
